Written by MonkeyInTheBath
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Topics: David Cameron, Spam

Wednesday, 7 April 2010

image for Cameron's spam ring
Cameron: His butler writes out his emails by hand for him to masturbate over

David Cameron announced today that the Conservatives would be using the internet to get their election message across.

He said, "We have always been a bit poor with technology, so we really want to get on the bandwagon."

Mr Cameron showed me a rough draft copy of the email which he promised he would send to everyone in Britain. He acknowledged there were a few mistakes but that it still gave the right message.

It reads:

Tired? Dysfunctional? That's broken Britain. And when Britain can't get it up and working, it needs the Conservatives to heal it. Think of the Conservative party as a blue pill that can ease your pain. So remember, at the general erection, vote blue.

If you would like to contribute to the Conservative Party, please send £100 to:

Conservative Party Central Office,
Account Number 72535233,
Nigerian Central Bank.

There Mr Cameron will ensure that Britain will become millions of pounds richer.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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