Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Erykah Badu

Monday, 5 April 2010

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UK Forces Are Ready To Deal With This Piece Of Chupacabra Shit

British authorities today announced that US hip-hop artiste Erykah Badu will be classed as an undesirable alien and banned from entering the United Kingdom, should she attempt to visit that country.

A spokesman from the British Home Office confirmed that British authorities had been consulting with a renowned Texas-based US journalist who keeps an eye out for untoward goings on, in what has become known as 'Operation Abel.'

The Home Office man said:

"We're very grateful to our renowned American cousin for bringing this person to our attention. This is exactly what the 'special relationship' between our two countries is really all about. Quite frankly, here in the UK we have more than our share of ugly skank hoes, and we don't need to be importing them from America."

Speaking off the record, a Royal spokesman, and proper Cockney Londoner, Dave Wight said that the UK certainly didn't need any mis-shapen lumps divesting themselves of their clothing in historic locations like Trafalgar 'bleedin' Square, Piccadilly 'soddin' Circus, The 'blinkin' Mall, and Stone-the bleedin crows-Henge.

UK Immigration Officers are well prepared should Erykah Badu attempt to circumvent customs posts, being armed with cattle prods and taser guns.

"She tries to come in here mate and we'll take her bleedin' down, no worries. We'll ave to keep 'er at a distance though - wot a bleedin' 'orrible skanky mare. I ain't touchin' that thing an' no mistake Guvnah!"

It seems the UK is prepared right enough mate.

Sidenote: - The man who stripped bare-naked in London's Oxford Street this morning and frolicked around in the traffic, was not, as first reports indicated, Sir Elton John, but a professional look-alike.

More as we get it.

Special thanks to Sir Abel Rodriguez, who inspired this article. A true gentleman and scholar of repute.

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