Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 30 March 2010

image for Queen plans April Fools Day spoof
Hahaha, fooled you all you 'orrible lot

London - (Rioters): In an amusing plan to give freeloading, money-grubbing politicans a massive jolt the Queen is planning to feign death on April Fools Day.

The cunning payback plot sees Prime Monster Gorgon Brown rush round to Clarence House to proclaim Prince Charles as the new Monarch of Albion soon after 9am.

And as the nation's TV cameras swarm outside Clarence House for the first glimpse of Brown trying to kiss ass - er, kiss hands! - with new Sovereign King Charles III the massive breaking news story is suddenly interrupted as Queen Elizabeth suddenly flashes up on a live Royal YouBoob! channel broadcast laughing and shouting hysterically "April Fools!"

The plan was hatched this week following disastrous ministerial advice to HM to invest most of her royal benefits giros in fledgeling Falkland Islands oil prospector Wannabe Petroleum.

However the drilling venture has bombed horribly amid reports that the marine derricks only managed to penetrate an ancient penguin cemetery and found absolutely zero crude or gas.

Today the company's shares lost 95% value and an extremely irate posse of Royal Navy admirals has threatened to send a massive, personal bill to Gorgon Brown for despatching two heavily armed RN destroyers to the South Atlantic to guard against any possible invasion by the Argies.

Some Palace staff are in on the April Fools wheeze which requires the assistance of a specialist hypnotist, fake medical equipment and copious supplies of hard liquor.

Suggestions that this is just a cover for HM's usual auto-erratic self-pleasuring activities have been strenuously denied.

The Duke of Edinburgh is a badass smack dealer.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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