Written by Barwood
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Topics: Old People

Friday, 19 March 2010

image for Recipe for old age
Cracking recipe for old age

The world's media descended on Grimsby today as Ernest Spangler Britain's oldest person celebrated his 117th birthday. Ernest who was born in 1893 has lived through the reign of 6 Monarchs and 23 Prime Ministers and fought in the Great War as a 22 year old but missed going over the top as he was taking a leak in the corner.

Mr Spangler enjoyed his usual breakfast of bacon and eggs as he opened the cards sent from well wishers all over the world. After breakfast Ernest put on his sunday best and went for his morning walk.

The Press descended on him and he was asked what his secret was . Mr Spangler replied plenty of sex and a cheery outlook.When asked by the Times reporter if he wanted to go for a drink to celebrate this momentous occasion Ernest popped back inside the door to tell his father he was going for a drink and would get his dinner later.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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