Written by Lady Godiva
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Topics: Susan Boyle, ASBO

Thursday, 4 March 2010

image for ASBOs prepared and ready to slap on American Subo fanatics
Irn Bru is made in Scotland, from girders.

Police have issued a statement today that they have already prepared ASBO's to slap on crazed American Subo fans when they next arrive in the UK. The riot squad is busy training for their arrival in the event that they are called to duty.

Police spokesman, Inspector Ivan R. Don, faced the press today and announced that the force is extremely well prepared, this time, for the influx of crazed fans said to be preparing yet another assault on Blackburn.

Names are already affixed to the ASBO's as police informants, who belong to British fansites, have been cooperating with police during the last 2 weeks, compiling lists of fanatics.

Many of the fanatics are the crazies who bought up all the Irn Bru last week. Incidentally, the Irn Bru company have informed the public that they WILL NOT sell their product to anyone with an American accent from this day forth.

Word has reached the American fans regarding the ASBOs. They do not have a clue what an ASBO is and when they heard that they were to receive ASBO's in the UK many went out and bought special outfits for the event.

Naturally they will be wearing their beloved red scarves and are said to be looking forward to the 'ceremony' at which they will be presented with their ASBO's.

Two 'special' Subo fanatics are said to be writing a special Blessing to bestow on the ASBO recipients.

Watch this space for further updates.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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