Buckingham Palace, London - (Rioters) Sources close to the HM The Queen today confirmed that Her Majesty is planning a Bonfire Night special treat for Prime Minister Tony Blair and his wife Cherry Bush, in a fitting tribute to whatever the outcome of the US presidential election may turn out to be.
As yet unconfirmed reports state that the Sovreign will launch Her new website on November 5th - Guy Fawkes Day - that will name all UK politicians, Provisional Ministry of Defence Personnel, bankers, financiers, A-Z list celebs and the entire gamut of British glitterati who shared in the $100billion Enron jackpot payout on New Year's Eve 1999, which led to the bankruptcy of the Texan energy giant in the autumn of 2001 and the collapse of the World Trade Center.
The move co-incides with reports that disgraced ex-US Ambassador to the Court of St James's William "Stamps" Farish III - who fled London in late June this year in a controversial move widely described as a diplomatic whitewash - is to be charged with 50 counts of fraud, racketeering, blackmail, subversion, subornment of juries and witnesses, hacking into the Metropolitan Police Serious Fraud Squad criminal records computer data base and erasing all traces of President George Bush's historical connections to the Sicilian Mafia.
Earlier this week, Yeomen of the Guard at the Tower of London were seen preparing large bundles of tar- smeared kindling which were being stacked up in a gigantic pyre right next to Traitors' Gate, modelled on the Enron logo. "This one's reserved for Cherry", said a spokesman who was binding branches of English Holm Oak with strands of poison ivy that feature so prominently in the Carole Caplin Wholesome Outdoor Pursuits Yearbook 2001.
Meanwhile in Washington DC, a White House spokesman said:"There is NO Enron scandal in Great Britain or anywhere else for that matter. The President's bagman, ex-Ambassador Farish, is not in custody and Mr Bush's Blind Trust Portfolio has not been sequestrated or frozen by the FBI pending investigation of an Israeli mole in the Pentagon".
Guy Fawkes Night on November 5th has been put forward as a new National Holiday in the UK.