Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Cheryl Cole

Wednesday, 17 February 2010

image for Lip-synch disaster as Cheryl Cole mimes at Brits
Cheryl's just so gay someone in the audience shouted last night

London - (Get-a-Grip): Desperately trying to emulate an already threadbare Michael Jackson routine vapid nonentity Cheryl Cole dazzled (sic) with a flaccid mimed performance at the Brits last night.

Even if it had been a lip-synch contest La Cole would have only scored a D-minus as the lyrics of her daftass No 1 hit single Fright for this Love failed to ignite any spark of talent.

A pointlessly crap scraped-back hair-do was at least mercifully camouflaged in the act's second half by hooded leotard.

Faux Ray-Bans completed the gormless wannabe somebody look that some aspiring Brits stylist was paid a small fortune to create.

But no amount of flanking by six-pack bare-chested Kanye West lookalikes could disguise the midget-sized talent that lurks beneath Cheryl's thin veneer of celebrity.

Lady Gaga is partially brain dead.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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