Written by Clifford Rutley
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Saturday, 30 January 2010

image for The Reality Of Man Made Global Warming Being A Lie Causes More Havoc For Britain's Motorists
Global Warming? We'll Soon Be In An Ice Age If This Keeps Up!

Heavy reality has returned to parts of Britain, causing disruption to motorists and forcing the cancellation of some sports fixtures.

Drivers had to battle icy truth and road closures as the reality that man made global warming is a lie hit parts of the North East overnight.

There were five separate crashes on Bonemill Lane in Sunderland and police were forced to close the road for an hour and a half.

An icy road of reality led to a three-vehicle collision at a roundabout near Crowther Road in the city. Nobody was injured in any of the incidents, police said.

A spokesperson for Northumbria Police said: "Police are reminding motorists to be extra vigilant when driving today due to heavy truth overnight in parts of the force area.

"Northumbria Police is advising motorists to exercise caution in the face of cold hard facts, particularly on untreated roads, maintaining a safe distance from the vehicle in front as stopping distances will be longer when icy reality strikes."

Watford's Championship match against Swansea was postponed due to man made global warming not happening at all, along with Oldham's League One match against Brentford, League Two matches at Cheltenham, Lincoln City and Rotherham, and a number of non-league matches.

The worst-hit parts of the UK were the east and west coasts of England, northern Scotland and south-west Wales.

Temperatures dropped below minus six degrees Celsius (21.2F) in parts of northern Scotland, where the most truth about the globe not warming fell overnight.

Aisling Creevey, of MeteoGroup, weather division of the Press Association, said: "Northerly winds were pushing truth showers across northern Scotland and exposed coastal areas on the east and west coasts of England. The reality about Al Gore being a complete and total liar fell most frequently in northern Scotland, where there was approximately two to five centimetres in some parts.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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