Written by rfreed
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Topics: Sherlock Holmes

Monday, 18 January 2010

image for Evidence Of The 'Real' Relationship Between Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson Discovered.
Oh joy, Watson! Are we going to play Doctor again?!

The long ongoing question of just what sort of 'relationship' there was between Sherlock Holmes and his 'companion' Dr. Watson has finally been found. The odd part of it is that the answer has been right in front of our noses for a century.

Refer please to the third paragraph of 'The Adventure Of The Speckled Band' by Arthur Conan Doyle...oh, EXCUSE me!!!! SIR Arthur Conan Doyle- everybody has to be so high and mighty these days. (No relation to Schwarzenegger's Conan the Barbarian or that red haired guy on late night TV who just lost his job). The paragraph is quoted here verbatim:

"Very sorry to knock you up, Watson," said he (Holmes), but it is the common lot this morning. Mrs. Hudson has been knocked up, she retorted upon me, and I on you."

Shocking, absolutely shocking! Not only does Holmes seem to admit to a dalliance with his famous assistant, but, God forbid, he's also apparently diddled his housekeeper as well. And if one reads it right, there is even some sort of odd , disengaged threesome going on. This is hard to take for those of us who were weaned on the great detectives infallible mind, his impeccable ethics and his unerring precision and determination in bringing down the baddies. Now to think that he was influenced by passions worse than his opium addiction is staggering.

Apologies must be given to those Sherlock Holmes hero worshipers for whom this brings disillusionment- greater idols have fallen, but this will surely rend some to the quick for whom the immortal sleuth was a demigod. Also, condolences to those for whom this announcement has put into their heads a terrible picture of these two hallmarks of British culture and role models that cannot be easily erased. Just the thought myself of these two intellectual and moral icons naked, commingling torridly in various acts of kama sutrafied lust makes me want to heave....oops, it just has.

Now we have some idea why these Scotland Yard boys are always so secretive.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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