Written by Johnny Cool
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Thursday, 24 December 2009

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A PREMIER League manager spent more than an hour in the company of hookers in a "Thai" vice den,

Simon Dogbreath a leading gambler has his money on Avram Grant at 2/1, Gary Megson at 6/1 and an outsider of 20/1 on Harry Rednapp 'Its easy youve just got to look out for the ugly ones, we all like a bit of totty and when your ugly or ginger its always harder to get. Harry would have only gone in if there was an agent with him. GianFrancos ugly but because he's Italian he gets away with it'

A spokesperson from refused to comment however Tobias from the greek chip shop in Portsmouth was quoted as saying 'I have a lot of Israeli mates who like giving it greek style and are well into a bit of ping pong hence why they always go to Thailand for their holidays, do you want a savoloy mate I'll do it for a quid.'

Asked for his opinion on why he thought it couldn't be Rafa Benetiz he stated ' at the moment Liverpool cant score anywhere and with his tactics his more likely to score an own goal and theres no way he'd last an hour'

Sarah from the alliance of prostitutes was adamant and claimed 'we offer a very vital service and all our girls including geezerbirds are always checked out, many of our professionals carry out fantasies for the clients- I once had to pretend to be a Chinese Alex Ferguson, all our services are confidential, must rush as I'm late for my Israeli lesson'

Abdul 'gloryhunter' Khan from London a keen Chelsea fan before he bacame a Man United fan then a Man City fan (all in one year), was disgraced at Mark Hughes sacking and felt it could have been part of Mark Huges compensation package.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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