Written by Lightning Conductor
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Monday, 14 December 2009

image for Longknob to enter X Factor in 2010
A rare photograph taken on "Thor Longknobs" recent "Clubbing Holiday" !

Brighton's leading Viking Re-enactor "Thor Longknob" is currently in training and hopes to lead the charge in next years X Factor competition!

He is currently working with his faithful assistant "Joy the Unflapplable" on the application form which he says is really,really hard!

Exact details of "Longknob's" performance are yet to be finalised but Danni & Cheryl can look forward to a large portion of raping and pillaging by the lusty bearded bezerker. "I'm going to tip Cole on her head and fill her up with...................(the rest of this rant is unprintable!)roared the Sussex Sex God as he battled his way across London Bridge to his HQ in the City.

Not wanting to be accused of being sexist, "Longknob" is also planning a nice treat for the boys, Simon will be axed (permanently) whilst Louis can expect a firm poking with Longknob's famous "Winged Helmet" !!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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