London - (Drowning Street): Special protection officers have told UK Prime Monster Gorgon Brown to wear body armour during meetings with Lord of Misrule Peter Mandelson.
Worried cops videotaped Brown's secret meeting last week behind a Clarence House Pudding Club franchise.
His rendezvous with Mandy started looking ugly and had to be broken up when a government metal detector failed mysteriously.
"Mandy's the ultimate poison-umbrella kinda minister," an Esso-13 source commented.
"Nothing would give him greater pleasure than seeing Brown's reaction to a dose of ricin."
Tomorrow will see Lord Mandelson's very first ermine-clad State Opening of Parliament.
Internet spread-betting index Aintgottaprayer.con goes even money on some natural, national disaster interrupting the floorshow.