Written by queen mudder
Print this
Topics: Parliament

Wednesday, 11 November 2009

image for Guns smuggled into House of Commons
Yates of the Yard: Clouseauesque grandmaster of the counterintelligence spoiler

London - (Arsenal): A routine scan has found dozens of small firearms and handguns have been smuggled into the Palace of Westmonster ahead of next Wednesday's State Opening of the Can of Worms, er...Parliament!

Covert CCTV equipment and metal detectors had recently been hardwired into MPs' security lockers in yet another hush-hush SO19 op.

And the genius behind the surveillance strategy? Step forward Yates of the Yard, dogged Cash-For-Honors sleuth and Clouseauesque grandmaster of the counterintelligence spoiler.

"Mr Delayed Gratification, that's what the boys in SO13 call him," Sgt Jim B Ergerac Green commented, "on account of his leisurely stringing along of the Blairs."

Other bastards on Yates' CV include pathological liar, braggard and self-deluding royal butler to Princess Diana Mr Paul Burrell.

Ex-Northern Ireland Police service CEO Sir Hugh Orde is 53.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 4?

8 20 22 10
53 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more