London - (Bye-Bye-Miss-American-Spy): The Astrologer Royal was taken away to the Royal Freak Hospital's Witchfinder General Wing today by the Third Royal Battalion of Men in White Coats.
Reporter were told his latest official advice to take arsenic or face the music went down badly by the Ratzinger Puppet Throne.
And as the Halloween weekend begins his zodiac forecast still rankles about the dire aspects for Saturday's Wiccan Feast of Samhain.
"Bweware the planet Saturn, mighty Lord of Karma, starting its exalted transit of Libra, sign of draconian justice and predestined heart attacks," were his last words of warning.
"Bah, humbug!" the Duke of Edinburgh hissed.
"The Old Girl will live to 100. Truss me. Got a clone in the attic. A dead ringer for the Old Coot. Perfect substitute in the event of some dreadful unforseen accident.
"Where's my blunderbuss?"
Windsor Castle is haunted like hell.