Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Free

Monday, 26 October 2009

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Not Free - In Jail - Half Price

Results of a recent survey have corroborated that the word 'free' is a particular favourite among Britons, and is quite popular across the Atlantic, in the land of the free.

Free, as a word, was invented by the rock band Free, who sang 'All Right Now' and was later adopted by Roger Daltrey, of the Who, who sang 'Free Me' on the soundtrack of the motion picture McVicar.

Which wasn't a motion picture about a vicar at all, but a film about a career criminal who spent most of his time in jail, thus not really being free at all.

Reports also suggest that the comedy catchphrase "I'm Free!" as spoken by actor John Inman in 70's TV sitcom 'Are You Being Served' in a distinctly gay way, has largely fallen into disuse.

In the mid 90's the word 'free' started to fade from general use, but emerged triumphant at the turn of the minellium in terms of 'buy one, get one free'

'Free' has come a long way from the days of 'Free Nelson Mandela' and is now equated with not paying for something.

'Free' movie downloads, 'free' DVD's, 'free admission' 'free will' and 'free' thinking have now become a staple of most people's vocabulary.

The rock band, 'Free' who invented the word before 'free love' was ever considered have shit out in a big way, as they failed to take out a patent on the word. Some bloke rummaging in a bin at Victoria Coach Station in Olde London Towne told us:

"If Paul Kossof was alive today he'd be turning in his grave."

Gordon Ramsay confirmed that there is no such thing as a 'free' lunch. Not in his restaurants anyway.

It remains an undisputed truth that writers for satirical website theSpoof.com serve up their unique brand of nonsensical whimsy for free, but most are quite happy with the arrangement.

Spoof administrator, Mark Lowton is not a free man. Insiders say that he sacrificed his liberty in 2003 when he founded theSpoof.com and his punishment for such a heinous crime is to daily read madcap contributions from a bunch of free spirited Spoof freeloaders

More when we get something else free.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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