Written by queen mudder
Print this
Topics: Harry Potter

Thursday, 24 September 2009

image for 25,000-volt cable terrifies Hogwarts Eurostar Express platform 9¾ passengers
Disgruntled parselmouth's Autumn Equinox serpensortia invocation?

London - (Slytherin Stuff): "We thought it might be Lord Voldemort's pet snake Nagini," a terrified passenger on the 5.13pm Paris to London Hogwarts Eurostar Express cried as a hexed live power cable came crashing down onto platform 9¾ at St Pancras Station yesterday.

The incident sparked widespread fears that a disgruntled parselmouth had cursed the Express service with an Autumn Equinox serpensortia invocation.

But the identity of the fiendish prankster behind the Slytherin's Basilisk incident remains a mystery.

British Rail said today they blamed unusual celestial activity in the Ophiuchus snake-holder constellation which the Sun normally transits around Halloween

The serpentine star cluster lies near the fabled zodiac karma traps of Acquila (The Eagle), Serpens (Snake-in-the-Grass) and Hercules (Jolly Green Giant).

JK Rowling has a boa constrictor tattoo on her forked tongue.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 4 plus 3?

9 7 2 8
111 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more