Residents of both the Isle of Wight and the Isle of Man are today in uproar as PC watchdog BAPS (British Assosiation of Political Stupidness) won a legal battle to rename the islands.
BAPS argued in court that in todays modern Britain having the words 'Wight' and 'Man' in place names was in someway discriminating against different ethnic groups, and women respectively.
The organisation's lawyer, Nigel Nigelson spoke after the hearing:
"We felt in someway that someone could at some point become slightly offended somehow by the names of these islands, and thought we best be on the safe side."
The judge in the matter, the Right Honourable Herbert Shuttlecock made the decision citing "You just cant be too careful nowadays".
The Isle of Wight will become the 'Isle of non descript colour, not to mention religion' and the Isle of Man will become 'Shitsville'.
Alan Titchmarsh who has a holiday home on the former Isle of Wight (he actually does, I looked it up and everything)
"This is absurd, the island has a long and wonderful history and the name is part of that, next they'll be stoping the annual 'Slap a Darky Festival'".