In a shock report, the Ministry of Health has announced that British holidaymakers habitually drink 80 beers in a one-week holiday!
"This is disgusting" says Health Minister Gillian Merron "they are risking their health and wellbeing for momentary pleasure".
Meanwhile, at an Industry Ministry lunch, Lord Peter Mangelson the Business Secretary and Minister With A Finger In Every Pie has praised the contribution made to the economy by British holidaymakers habitually drinking 80 beers in a one-week holiday.
"Only with this kind of dedicated pissing up will the economic recovery continue. Only willing volunteers are selected to undertake these "alcoholidays" as they are known".
The Dark Lord also announced a new Industry Ministry initiative under which Brit holidaymakers who exceed the 80 beers a week target will be rewarded with shots of spirits on a one-to-one basis.
The Health Minister was apparently not keen on this plan, but has bitten her tongue because she wants to keep her job.
Icelandic holidaymaker, Kjelly Gustafserperssssssonbergsson commented "80 beers a week - what is wrong with these Brits - what do they drink after Tuesday morning"?