Dog loving residents across the UK are up in arms this week after their application to introduce a best 'mixed breeds' section at the Famous Crufts show was poo pooed and thrown out.
Spokesperson for the Mongrel Owners Club of Great Britain Mrs.Audrey Whip (Old Walnut to her friends) said, "this is a devastating blow to all concerned. Many people around the land have bred some strange and wonderful beasts for this show, it's just not fair".
Tommy Hindequarter a mixed breed dog owner from Southbank in Teeside explained that he had worked hard for months preparing Albert, his Staffordshire Bull Bordersation ready for this years show and had been determined to beat the favourite, trixie the Long haired Jackrador.
Maureen Poke from Edinburgh was all set to travel to the prestigious Crufts with her dog Audrey when she received the news. Mrs Poke was close to tears as she groomed her beloved pooch which has a great Danes Head and terrier body. "I'm heartbroken" she sobbed, Audrey was in the "dogs that keep falling over because of their big heads section" and were sure we would win.
Rivalry is rife in this seedy underworld of unscrupulous experimenters. At one recent mixed breeds show there was a mass battle between judges and dog owners after Blimp, the 24ft long Collie-Sausage took first prize.