A celebrity who must remain nameless has been arrested for assault. The troubled celebrity was recently axed as the face of a supermarket chain following cocaine taking revelations.
The latest incident further damages the celebrity's reputation.
Media commentator Dick Head said "This woman, who I am not allowed to mention, has a serious problem with drugs. She has added violence to her drug taking. Her career could be over."
Detective Inspector Snapper said "I can confirm that a fat woman was arrested for assault. I cannot name this woman or the supermarket who used to employ her. In fact there is little more I can say regarding this matter."
Any resemblance to anyone famous is purely accidental.