Ballybollox Castle, Scotland - (Rioters): Michael Jackson's anaesthetist has been secretly airlifted to the Queen's Scottish squat after the NHS refused to top up her Diprivan drip following a hunting accident to her ass. Er, nose!
Conrad Murray arrived late last night after hitching a lift on a Queasy Jet subcontracted to a former CIA extraordinary rendition waterboarding unit.
The notorious old monarchy hoaxer had pleaded with flunkies for the propofol hit despite already being on a maintenance cocktail of methodone scrip.
Internet bookmakers Aintgottaprayer.con are going evcen money for Old Fatty Mountbatten to pop her clogs 'any time from 30 July to 1 August'.
"We've always reckoned she'll go in exactly the same way as her sordid little toe rag son Jackson," the bookies spokesman explained today.