Written by Earl Grey
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Topics: Pornography

Friday, 10 July 2009

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"Who wants to be a policeman?"

Toy manufacturer and retailer Toys IS We announced today that they were diversifying into the adult market.

"The recession has hit us really hard" said chief executive Dick Phillpot. "I had to decide to make a go of it. It was backs against the wall time. Then I had an idea. Dildos!"

They launched their Action Man Dildo range earlier this year. The dildos come with a range of camouflage outfits. and their is even one where you can pull the string and it says "Enemy approaching to the rear!"

The company have decided to change their name following the huge success. Not everybody is pleased. Mrs Ewen Chatfield of Wakefield said "I came in for a doll for my daughter Gordon. What i found was a plethora of whips, chains and sex aids. I'm pretty broad minded-well, I do live in Wakefield-but this was too much."

The company, however, refuse to apologise. "We have a new target audience. The perverts, sick bastards, sex-mad and frustrated will always be there. I've got a living to make" said Phillpot.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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