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Thursday, 18 June 2009

image for Adam Lambert - Rick Astley In Disguise?
Rick Astley - Can't Get Any Peace these Days. Even When He's On The Toilet.

Ground breaking news from our Hollywood correspondent today suggests that American Idol Adam Lambert could actually be 80s Brit superstar Rick Astley in disguise.

Astley and Lambert have reportedly shared characteristics, and although Lambert may be enjoying a brief flirtation with fame, he has a long way to go before he reaches the dizzy heights of celebrity enjoyed by Astley.

But are they the same person?

Spoof correspondent, Ludwig Van Beethoven, who insists he can spell 'definitely' correctly, as well as banging out a few symphonies, definitely, told us:

"I think they may be the same person, but whereas Lambert gets lots of internet hits he has a long way to go before he makes an urban rhythm classic like 'Never Gonna Give You Up' which has since passed into internet history as being Rick-rolled."

So much for that then.

Rick Astley was on the toilet when we rang his doorbell this morning. But apart from shouting for toilet tissue he was said to be unperturbed and denied being Adam Lambert.

"He's much younger than me," Astley told us through the half opened bathroom window as he took a dump. "And I'm not really bothered what you think. It's a spoof website you're reading. Make of it what you will. But I'm not really Adam Lambert. I'm not Harry Potter either, so do me a favour and fuck off while I wipe my arse."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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