Written by Skoob1999
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Friday, 29 May 2009

image for Britain's Got Talent - Cowbell And Parents Should Be Hung For Child Abuse
The Whole Thing Is Such A Farce It's Fucking Criminal

Precocious brat, Hollie Steel, from Accrington may have lost the plot and cracked up in the Britain's Got Talent semi final, but she sure stuck to the script.

Judge, Amanda Holden was able to up her humanitarian status as she pretended to approach the youngster in protective maternal mode, and Cowbell was able to assert his authority by giving the kid a break.

"Who do these people think they're fooling? If Hollie Steel was unable to respond to pressure she should never have been allowed on the show in the first place," Sir Alex Ferguson told us. "Kids should be protected. These people are a bloody disgrace."

Following a break in order to compose herself, young Hollie Steel cruised through to tomorrow's final.

Even though they haven't got that far yet, but we just know that they will. Just watch. It's now 21:11 BST, and it hasn't happened yet. But it will.

More when we're proved right.

Yup, surprise surprise.

It's now 22:00 BST

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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