A perfect place has been found for all of those MPs who have decided to end it all. The moat at the centre of allegations is the perfect place to die.
One MP who did not want to be named said, "Well the horse shit has hit the fan for sure. We MPs are above and beyond all of what has been said so we will teach you lot a lesson by killing ourselves."
A special hot line has been set up to advise MPs of all parties on how to commit suicide, even though suicide is unlawful. Well as one MP put it, "Suicide is to be done in the spirit of the times"
It is such a shame that the MPs find themselves suffering. It will make a change from the public whom they serve from suffering. Bring on the General Election, don't commit suicide by killing yourselves stand at the next general election, political suicide is far better than actual suicide.