Written by IainB
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Wednesday, 20 May 2009

image for National Space Centre closes
Emergency spaces will have to be imported

The National Space Centre in Surrey will be closing it's doors for the final time at the end of July.

"It's a catastrophe," said long time space buff, Elton John. "Where will I get the space I need for my expansive wardrobe now?"

Elton has long since been a fan of the Surrey based Space Centre that has supplied him with the extra space he needed in his wardrobe whenever his clothes filled the space he already had.

Other victims of the Space Centre's closing are car parking officials in the nation's capital, who have long hired extra spaces during sporting events. The upcoming Olympics will put extra strain on the car-parking spaces in London. Without the National Space Centre to provide extra spaces in an emergency thousands will be left endlessly circling the city's roads looking for an elusive space.

Keyboard manufacturers who previously sourced all space bars from the National Space Centre will now have to import them from the Chinese Space Centre, fuelling the controversy over exporting British jobs in the space industry to the expanding space facilities in the Far East.

To further compound the misery, all the space that was previously stored at the National Space Centre will now have to be stored elsewhere. Cardiff has been earmarked as a possible location. Local residents are up in arms, as they already have plenty of space and don't want any more.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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