Written by Bluebella
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Topics: Australia

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

image for PM admits sending convicts to Australia was an error
What WERE they thinking in 1788?

England has admitted it made a grave mistake in sending all its convicts to the new found land of Australia in 1788. PM Gordon Brown made a speech at the House of Commons yesterday in regard to the error. He claims newly uncovered documents outline that the criminals were meant to stay in England and sent to the Isle of Man, while the remaining population of Britain were supposed to be sent to the paradise island in the southern hemisphere.

"I mean the error is obvious" said Brown "What the FUCK were they thinking sending the convicts to serve their time on a tropical island with white sand, palm trees and waves? Where in the world do criminals get treated with such revere? What's next? Sony Playstations in their cells?" (well, uh, actually. . . .)

Brown then called up the Prime Minister of Australia, Kevin Rudd to explain the error. "Yeah so basically Kev, what we are saying is that we want the error reversed. What do you think about swapping?"

Rudd hung up in Brown's ear but then called back to say he may consider so long as Kylie Minogue and sister Danni are given back to Australia. And Harold from Neighbours is sent back to England.

Mr Brown then hung up in his ear and muttered "nothing is worth THAT!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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