Written by Skoob1999
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Monday, 11 May 2009

image for Vatican Slams Angels And Daemons
Robert Kilroy Silk in Angels and Daemons.

In a week that sees the general release of the much awaited 'Angels And Daemons' movie starring Tom Shank, from a novel by Stan Brown which depicts a 'titanic struggle between good and evil' we were despatched to the eternal city of Rome to find out what the Vatican made of all the fuss.

Unable to gain direct access to the Holy Father, we had to settle instead for an interview with a trainee priest outside the Vatican Post Office in Saint Peter's Square, which is not actually square, more sort of round, and designed by Bernini, like most of everything in Rome.

"So, have you seen the movie yet?" we asked the trainee priest, Father (to be) Dermot O'Reilly.

"I haven't," he told us. "But I did read the book, and if the movie is half the pile of bollix that the book was then it'll be the biggest heap o' shite since that DaVinci thing."

The book and the movie depict an attempt by an extremist Christian group to destroy the Catholic church by blowing it up with a bomb derived from that Swiss machine thing that's meant to make a black hole, the Large Hadron Collider.

"The book was crap," O'Reilly told us. "So it seems like logical progression that the movie will be crap too. I've heard that it stretches credibility to the limit, even if it does have Obi Wan Knobe out of Star Wars in it."

At which point we asked Father (to be) O'Reilly for a brief summary. He told us:

"Watch the 'Da Vinci Broad' instead. It's a triple-X rated adult feature, which is also utterly unbelievable, but marginally more enjoyable."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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