Written by Skoob1999
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Saturday, 9 May 2009

image for BGT - Waiter Sends Boss Obscene Text After Wowing Judges
You can stick your job right up your...

In a show dominated by strippers, belly dancers and crap singers Britain's Got Talent partially redeemed itself when a young man named Greg Pritchard took the stage, looking every inch the rock icon.

Introducing himself as a hotel waiter, Greg went on to shock the world by singing Puccini's Nessun Dorma, from the opera Turandot - in soprano.

Once everyone had got over the shock, Greg was given a unanimous 'yes' vote from all three judges. Then, no sooner had he walked offstage than he had plucked out his mobile phone and was texting furiously.

"Girlfriend? Mum?" we asked.

"My boss," Greg told us. He then turned the phone towards us and we saw a message which had words to the effect that his boss could go forth and multiply and stick his job in a dark, very dark, place.

We questioned the wisdom of such a rash move, but Greg was unrepentant. "If I only get pub gigs," he told us, "It's got to be better than what I'm doing now."

We couldn't really argue with that. Although we know some people who probably could.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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