There was terror and pandemonium in the northwest of England at lunchtime today, after an earthquake struck the Lancashire town of Lancaster, home of the UK's premier news and bullshit outlet, TheSpoof.com.
The quake, measuring 0.0zero on the Richter Scale, but 10.9 on the Lowton Scale, hit the area at around 11.15am, causing locals to raise their eyebrows, and stop what they were doing.
Several people asked each other what the strange rumbling was, and many others thought it might have been an earthquake. One concerned but loopy citizen, Elsie Maykitup, 91, said:
"I w'ravin a cuppa tea. Suddenly, there w'ra shakin an' a rattlin an' a rockin an' a rollin. It w' like it w' back in 50s!"
Another person who felt the power of the earth's plates rubbing together hundreds of miles underground, was retired milkman, Reg Gubbins, who said:
"What w're it?"
The amount of damage caused by the quake isn't yet known, but it's estimated that the eventual cost could run into money.
Seismologists said that they think the incident may not have been an actual earthquake, but may have been caused by the administrator of TheSpoof.com, who is thought to have rebooted his system around the time the disturbance was felt.