Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Stupid, Airplane, Plane

Saturday, 25 April 2009

image for Plane Stupid Woman Is Plain Stupid
Assistant Chief Constable Hamilton today

A woman activist from the environmental protest group, Plane Stupid, who made an allegation that officers from Strathclyde Police approached her, and offered her payment for information about other protesters, has been called 'plain stupid'.

Matilda Gifford was part of the group who disrupted proceedings at Aberdeen airport recently, and claims that, afterwards, she received phone calls from police, who asked her to 'grass' on her friends. In return, they would help her with her Student Loan.

Miss Gifford, thick, told Radio 5 Live listeners that she recorded the officers' phone calls, but when asked ANY QUESTION by presenter Phil Williams, merely responded:

"We are a non-violent group protesting on environmental issues and no threat to the public. This police action was unfair, underhand and disproportionate. They are trying to disrupt the legitimate activity of environmental groups. There's also something else about 'power dynamics', which I can't remember."

The Assistant Chief Constable of Strathclyde Police, George Hamilton, said the force had "a responsibility to gather intelligence".

"Officers from Strathclyde Police have been in contact with a number of protesters who were involved with the Plane Stupid protests including Aberdeen airport," he said.

"The purpose of this contact has been to ensure that any future protest activity is carried out within the law and in a manner which respects the rights of all concerned. For this woman to think that we would allow this kind of action to continue without doing anything about it, is just plain stupid, and so is she."

But, in a well-prepared statement, Miss Gifford said:

"We are a non-violent group protesting on environmental issues and no threat to the public. This police action was unfair, underhand and disproportionate. police were trying to disrupt the legitimate activity of environmental groups. There's also something else about 'power dynamics', which I can't remember."

AGAIN.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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