Written by Earl Grey
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Sunday, 19 April 2009

image for Riot Police To Wear Numbers
"And the Queen is being introduced to the police side before the match"

Following the fallout from the G20 riots police are to wear football style numbers on their backs at future riots. It is hoped that this will lead to the swift identification of any wrong doers. They will then be shown either the yellow or red cards depending on the nature of the offense, with killing someone earning an automatic two match ban.

The new Metropolitan Police Chief Commissioner Trevor Brooking said "Obviously we hope to select a well balanced force. A solid defense and try to crowd them in midfield. I've got plenty of attacking options obviously. And obviously I'm going to say obviously many times during half time."

The Police are hoping that they can beat all opposition put in front of them. However, they are going to have to watch out for off the ball incidents which are easily picked up on camera. The last thing they want tis to reach the final and have to play an inexperienced line up due to suspensions.

Supporters were asked for their opinion. "Who's the bastards in the black?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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