Written by Earl Grey
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Wednesday, 15 April 2009

image for Complaints "Flood In" Over Talent Show
Some Talent Earlier Today

The 'talent show' Britain's Got Talent has seen a 'large' number of complaints regarding its latest broadcast. On the show one act, Miss Brenda Windsor, stripped in front of the panel. She hoped that by displaying her....talents that she would continue to feature on the show.

Following the show, watched by over 11 million sad bastards, 30 people wrote in and complained. John Cole of Nova Mews wrote "Why was she only on for 5 minutes? And why did you cover up all the good bits?"

Miss Stephanie Prude of Scarborough said "As a woman I object to this sort of thing. I object to anything that might seem to be a bit of fun between adults. I object to sex. But then I never have sex anyway."

Mr Darryl Carruthers of Wellingborough said "Why couldn't that nice Mr Cowell have took his clothes off. I bet he's talented"

The majority of the complaints were about one of the judges, Piers Morgan. Charlie Patel of Morden wrote "Dear Sirs, I would like to complain about Piers Morgan. Thank you. Yours, Charlie Patel"

Piers Morgan was unavailable for intelligent comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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