London - (Goody Friday Peace Agreement Mess): Notorious Anglo-Irish terror cult the Reality TV IRA has threatened to bomb to smithereens UK security listening posts such as GCHQ and RAF Menwith Balls.
The dissident mobsters are planning to steal a radar-busting dirigible, fill it with lighter gas and set it on a crash course with the MoD communications intercept stations.
The shadowy paramilitary group's reputation has become a laughing stock in organized crime cartels such as the White House and 10 Downing Street despite robust evidence of masterminding the entire 9/11 atrocity.
"We blame our former quartermaster-general Jade Goody RIP," the cult's spokesman said today.
"Once she'd had the kudos of the London Baltic Exchange blast she lost all interest in anything bar lining her own bottomless pockets."
Jack Weed is back in the slammer for GBH.