A loose alliance of influential UK citizens today lobbied the UK Press Council to desist from publishing Jade Goody stories any further, as they are pointless, and are beginning to cause severe irritation.
"We're sick of them," Salmon Rushdie, a novelist explained. "The girl is dead, and still she is splashed all over the tabloids. We've had pictures of Jade in a swimsuit, Jade riding a camel, Jade in wellies, Jade with hair, Jade without hair, Jade in a wheelchair...
"For the love of God it has to end at some point."
"My esteemed colleague is spot on," agreed acting legend Sir Del Boy Jason. "Did you know that one of the redtops published a facsimile of her final letter to her kids? That's disgraceful by anybody's standards."
Sir John Rottin, esteemed musical person added:
"When you think that dozens of journalists are paying their mortgages with proceeds ill-gotten through the demise of a talentless little woman who got sick and died, it makes you think. What kind of world is it that we live in?"
Thank heaven TheSpoof.com didn't jump on the bandwagon.
Hopefully, no more as we don't get it.