Written by student85
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Sunday, 15 March 2009

It has emerged today that British television superstar and glamour icon Jade Goody may be cured as a result of a procedure loosely based on the resurrection abilities of the villainous robotic race on outgoing American sci-fi series Battlestar Galactica. Goody's publicist Max Clifford said that 'Jade Goody is obviously one of the most loved women in history and so it seems to me, that it makes sense to use her to bring this groundbreaking procedure to life'.

On the television series itself, the cybernetic humanoid race (the Cylons) have the ability to organically transfer their consciousness into identical bodies upon death. The Spoof asked Mr Clifford if they had a Jade Goody avatar ready for her 'soul' to download into; Mr Clifford responded by saying 'of course not, [Cylon] resurrection is something of science fiction. What we plan to do is a uniquely human endeavour, partly inspired by the show.'

The Spoof understands that Jade Goody's brain will be removed from her skull whilst she is still alive and placed into a new body; the volunteer who donates her (or his) body will die. According to Clifford, Goody is canvassing applicants and is said to be particularly attracted to continuing her life in the body of fellow genius Gail Trimble; however, The Spoof has learnt that ethnic minorities are barred from applying.

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