The refusal of the most famous pirate in the world, Long John Silver, to contribute a segment to the Spoof.com's collaborative exercise, 'Below Decks' has sparked Global outrage.
Long John Silver has isolated himself in his Caribbean home since Sunday and has refused to answer the door, take calls, or reply to eMails as a media armada washed up outside his property.
"it's an outrage!" pirate actress Keira Knightley fumed. "Who the bloody hell does he think he is? Some of the most prestigious writers in the world are champing at the bit to get on board this project, and this peg-legged asshole declines to take part. Words fail me. Almost."
Leading project engineer Morse told us from his pirate's hideaway in the Carolinas:
"If Long John Silver doesn't want to take part, I guess that's his prerogative. But if you do see him, could you give him this black spot?"
Silver cited a full diary and upcoming football fixtures as his reasons to decline the invitation before going into hiding.
BuckwheatsButt, one of the architects of the Below Decks project was last seen frolicking about on Wilshire Boulevard in La La Land propositioning a variety of young females clad in pirate attire.
More as we get it