Written by Earl Grey
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Topics: Telephone, BT

Monday, 2 March 2009

image for Beatie Strikes Again
Warning: It could lead to prostitution

The confidence trickster and professional thief known only as Beatie has struck again. Sid Bonkers, an 83 year old war veteran and former charity volunteer who loves children and puppies is the latest victim.

"I just needed some batteries for my phone. Beatie said she would come round and do it no problem. But then when she sent the boys round they demanded £1,000,000. I haven't got that sort of money. So I had to sell the wife".

Yes, shocking but true. 86 year old Doris Bonkers has been sold to an Albanian pimping organisation known as Beatie Connect. This is a suspected subsidiary of the actual Beatie criminal organisation.

Beatie is thought to be related to the notorious Busby gang who caused so much mayhem in the late 1970s and early 80s. Also it is suspected that the notorious Sid, who helped talk up the price of gas without ever actually being seen, might be just another alias.

For now please heed the warning of Sid Bonkers. If you don't want your wife of 60 years to become a prostitute keep clear of Beatie.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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