Written by Philip McArthur
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Friday, 20 February 2009

image for Sex Offenders to have Knackers Smacked with Wooden Gavel
One of the suggested designs for a "Knacker smaker gavel"

In the first of several attempts to gain the high ground on Law and Order issues, a Conservative Think Tank has suggested that rather than send sex offenders to jail, the result of which they claim, is high cost to the taxpayer with dubious corrective effect, a High Court Judge could deliver summary justice himself with a swift blow to the offender's testicles with his gavel.

A Sadomasochistic group thought to consist of several High Court Judges excited at the prospect of a naked pedophile spreadeagled on a Court Bench has expressed an interest and is keen to conduct a trial.

However a spokesperson from the Society for Human Rights said last night "I will strenuously oppose this barbaric suggestion and will not agree to any trial period........ unless I can watch!!!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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