Written by Sir Alan
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Thursday, 19 February 2009

image for Norfolk not as flat as first thought
Norfolk turkey

A team of Dutch investigators from the Dutch Flat Earth Society have concluded that Norfolk is not as flat as some have suggested. Dr Rip Van Scrotum, spokesman for the Society states that it appears that the highest point is some 2 metres higher than previously measured. This point, known as Pigg's Grave, has been measured by the Flat Earth team at 102 metres.

'We took lots of measurements at different times of the year, and can only conclude that a massive mistake was made when surveyed by the British. We in Holland are pretty good with our surveys, and regularly check our highest points for height increases. Only last week we found a 2 centimetre error on one point. What do the British know about flat?'

When these findings were put to Norfolk County Council, their surveyor poured scorn on the findings. He states that when they did their own survey, they found a potato clamp on the spot where they had measured.

Dr Scrotum has since been unavailable for comment. He is currently involved in a survey of the effects of sunshine on the flat lands of Florida.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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