Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Art, Horse, balls

Wednesday, 11 February 2009

image for 'Stallion Of The South' - At Last, Art With Balls
How Big's Yours' Then?

It will stand proudly in the Kent countryside, near the New Town Of Ebbsfleet Valley. It will be 164 feet tall, and probably made of concrete and fibreglass. It is the South's answer to 'The Angel Of The North' - a huge statue of a horse which will be visible from the A2 and Eurostar trains, which will be known as 'The Stallion Of The South'.

And it will be anatomically correct.

Which hasn't half upset a lot of people.

"Does that mean it'll have a huge cock and balls?" a local resident, Mrs Annie Mall, aged 84, asked us: "Or will they cover it up or something? I mean, you know what they say about horses and their 'love things'".

We informed Mrs Mall that the creature would be portrayed in its natural state, unobscured by blankets or other such praphernalia, and that she would be able to get a clear view of it from her home, which overlooks the site of the public artwork.

"How lovely!" she exclaimed. "I'd much rather look at a white stallion than a rusty old angel. Besides which, I haven't seen a huge cock and balls first thing in the morning for a long time."

At which point, Mrs Mall cackled in such a lusty manner that we mumbled our excuses and left.

More as we get it.

From our Arts Correspondent, Michelangelina.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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