Written by nevie
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Topics: Poo, Toilet, Graffiti

Monday, 9 February 2009

image for Writing's on the Wall For Poo-etry Corner

A West London poet today unveiled his latest anthology, written entirely on the wall in a public lavatory in Ealing.

Ed Ponse, a little known author, claimed to have been inspired to write the prose after a particularly lengthy visit to the loo last month. Mr Ponse said "I'd had this, like, really dodgy curry one night so I, like, came in here and ended up sitting around for, like, an hour? With, like, nothing to do? All the time my mind was, like, going mental with all these, like, great poems which I just had to, like, get down for future generations. I've got to, like, admit I quite, like, like the results."

At this point Mr Ponse had to cut short the press conference in order to take his medication.

Residents of Ealing have, so far, been unimpressed by Ponse's efforts. Local resident Tom Peeping, who preferred to remain anonymous, told us: "It's disgusting. I came in here to do a bit of cottaging like I do every Wednesday evening and I was appalled to find this filth written all over the walls. Moral standards in this country really are going downhill. He'd even papered over the glory-holes with this muck."

The local MP for the area had this to say: "My constituents are incensed by this. We're not interested in reading what young ladies from various parts of the country get up to at night. That's what Myspace is for. Although, apparently, there is one girl from Gloucester who seems to have been a bit of a go-er. Anyone know where I can get her number?"

This is the second time a public loo has been used in art. In 2007 artist Phil Meole was arrested at the unveiling of his exhibition entitled 'Shit Art' in Chesterfield. Police described the title as 'apt'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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