Written by Steddyeddy
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Topics: Cocaine, Snow

Sunday, 8 February 2009

image for Man revealed to have drowned in snow he thought was cocaine
Happy go lucky Mr O'Flaherty before his sniffing-cum-drowning incident

When Seamus O'Flaherty from Galway was found face-down, dead in the snow outside Terminal 5 at London's Heathrow airport yesterday, it was first thought that he may have been mugged, stabbed, knocked over, drunk or simply died of natural causes waiting for his luggage.

However, the coroner's report issued today revealed that he had in fact drowned, face-down in 14cm of snow covering the streets at the time.

It was only when a friend of Mr O'Flaherty, Mick MacPintglass, came forward, that the true tragedy of Mr O'Flaherty's death was revealed.

According to Mr MacPintglass, this was the first time both men had ventured outside Ireland in their lives. In fact neither had been further than the Galway General Post Office before.

When they exited the terminal at Heathrow, it seems Mr O'Flaherty, who had been reading about drugs on the 'plane, had decided that he was going to try some.

Seeing the snow for the very first time, he mistakenly assumed it was the nickname for cocaine and lay down to sniff it up his nose. However, after 23 minutes of attempting to get high, he drowned in melting snow caused by the heat from his face.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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