The Royal Mint has advised that the 10pence coin is to be removed from circulation. Officials have realised that the coin is actually a little under an inch in diameter, the records list the coin as actually being an inch in it's diameter.
There are currently 76 billion 10 pence coins in circulation and every single one will have to be returned and ticked off a large spreadsheet that Alistair Darling operates. Once all the coins have been returned the Mint will then press new ones at the correct diameter. A spokesman said that someone had made a mistake when using Pi. "They simply didn't use enough decimal points when calculating the diameter and this is the cock up we get."
The Torys said that this was simply further proof that the government didn't know it's arse from it's elbow. It is estimated that this will recall will cost some 150billion in US Dollars.
A fat man from Kidderminster was concerned about vending machines. "How will I get my Mars Bars out the machine now?" He asked. "This is news is just gutting. Yesterday we heard that Kit Kats were to be banned now this."
A special task force has been employed to visit every home in the UK and search down the back of sofas for missing coins. The team made up of special SAS types said " People just don't look hard enough for this type of thing, their all lazy bastards."