Written by IainB
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Monday, 2 February 2009

image for National Sickie Day: A Success
Achoo. Too ill to work, for one day anyway.

After the failure of National Sausage Day, and National Toilet Paper Day, the Department of Stupidly Named Days did not hold out much hope for the latest initiative: National Sickie Day.

The first Monday in February has been dubbed National Sickie Day and workers across the UK are encouraged to pretend to be ill and not go into work.

However, uptake on this year's National Sickie Day has been the best for many years. Across the country, the poor weather and viruses that 'are going round' has seen trains cancelled due to a lack of drivers, and power stations working at reduced capacity due to a lack of skilled staff. Schools have closed due to a lack of teachers who are not ill, and company bosses are up in arms at choosing a National Sickie Day.

"We're quite surprised at the uptake," said Mel Odie, of the Department of Stupidly Named Days. "Very few people ate Cornish Pasties last Cornish Pasty Day or went sky diving on Sky Diving Tuesday, but there's been a huge number of sickies pulled today. We've not got the official figures yet, but early indications indicate that at least ten percent of the British Workforce called in sick this morning. We're very pleased."

The lack of official figures has been put down to the fact that the person who's job it is to collate the official figures called in sick.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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