Chickens are now once again recognized as legal tender. In a bid to kick start the economy, the government has reintroduced the age old trading laws of "bartering".
A spokesman for NEXT, the popular high street name, said "How are we supposed to trade top quality garments for wildfowl and grain? I don't think the scheme will work."
Despite reservations from several other retailers, the government have said that any shopkeepers who do not embrace the scheme will be lined up and shot at with piping hot mince pies. If stubborn retailers still rebel against the new laws, then the government has the power to punish the culprits with wedgies and chinese burns.
"This is an opportunity to rebuild the economy and we will not let the greedy fat cats scupper the scheme" said a government spokesman.