London - BBC officials are quickly backpedaling on reports warning that Londoners have turkey fat for brains.
BBC spokeman Simon Heath says "We hold the opinions of our viewership in the highest regard, notwithstanding the unevenness of some of our programming and news reporting."
"I personally apologize for anything that I or any of my staff that may have said or written that may be construed in any way suggesting that Londoners have turkey fat for brains."
BBC news has quickly countered by running a story urgently warning Londoners not to pour turkey fat down their drains this Christmas to avoid blockages.
Bethnal Green resident Delbert Woods says that "this is just a shabby attempt to cover-up errant remarks about the intellectual capacity of loyal taxpaying Londoners that patronize the Beeb."
Thames Waterman Jeff Wasny indicates "500 tonnes of turkey fat are poured down drains during the festive season, when up to 25% more fat, oil and grease is put down there. When fat is poured down the sink it quickly cools in the sewer before solidifying and causing blockages."
Delbert Woods replied "Pass the cranberry sauce mum."