Written by Phil Edgar's Bones
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Sunday, 7 December 2008

image for Karen Matthews Is The BBC's Tracy Beaker's Real Mum Shock Disgust Horror!
This is heartless Karen's only true-friend, says her daughter Tracy Beaker!

The most evil woman at the moment, Karen Matthews, is the secret mother of the fictional Tracy Beaker, says me.

It can be revealed by me, that evil Karen, 32 and 3/4, had Tracy when she was ten years old and then discarded her in a television program kiddies home, so she could concentrate on being bad, wicked and a 'hootchie mama'.

The fictional Tracy, now 23 years old said " I do not wish to see Ms Matthews, as she has not made any attempt contact me in the last twenty years. She must have read about me in Jacqueline Wilson's books or seen me being a sass-mouth on CBBC, but she did nothing. I have got my life together and while I am still living in a kid's home, so what? At least I am not kidnapping my own child for booze and fags".

Matthews is currently residing in "The Wormwood Scrubs Institute For Refined Gentle Ladies and Wayward Slags". She had nothing to say that was worth printing.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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