Written by ABladon

Print this

Tuesday, 2 December 2008

image for Queen admits 'I invested in Lehamn Brothers'

Buckingham Palace have issued a statement today detailing the Queen's financial loss since the beginning of the credit crunch almost 18 months ago. Her majesty is proclaimed to be a 'passionate player in the global stock market' is often seen emailing her stockbroker at royal events on her Blackberry.

Lehman Brothers ceased trading on 15th September 2008 following an application for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in New York, during which time her majesty was on a royal excursion to a butter factory in Somerset. Witnesses say that one of her closest advisers took her to one side, where it is thought she was told the news before leaving the factory and spending almost 40 minutes on her mobile phone in the car park.

In an interview with Reuters the Queens stockbroker stated: "Naturally, I cant reveal any details on the queens finances, but I received a call from her shortly after the collapses of Lehmans. She was furious, screaming profanities down the phone as if it was my fault. I did what I could but she literally lost everything."

It is believed that the Royal Portfolio consists of assets in the region of £500 million, scattered across equities, fixed interest savings accounts and Index linked gilts. The last time a financial crisis occurred in 1927 the residing Queen, Victoria, demanded her money back from banks that simply couldn't afford it, further escalating the stock market crash.

Make ABladon's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 plus 1?

5 3 16 25

Go to top