The much reported runaway train, last seen coming over the hill and blowing, is actually out of control, Railtrack admitted moments ago.
The train has been running away all over the rail network for almost four hours now, causing widespread disruption, including hundreds of delays and cancellations nationwide.
Details as to exactly why the runaway train ran away in the first place remain sketchy.
The runaway train has been sighted running away in places as far afield as Inverness, Watford, Penzance and Norwich.
Rail chiefs have assembled in central London in a bid to get the runaway train to stop running away, but Railtrack chiefs were left to announce that the runaway train was out of control, and that there was very little they could do about it.
Commuters heading home after a hard day of denying loan applications in the city of London were reportedly furious.
One was seen to be scowling.
Yet another was rude to a member of station staff.
Yet the runaway train keeps on running.
Instant updates as we get them.